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  • hoffywhf

The Luddite Lives

Whenever I am compelled by necessity to touch Melissa’s computer, no matter how easy or simple the task may be I somehow manage to screw it up beyond reason. Yesterday Melissa asked me to do the payroll. Since we have a grand total of two employees completing the required forms should have taken no more than a few minutes. It took me the better part of six hours (Melissa here – and about a bazillion phone calls to me as well).

About midway through yesterday’s operation the computer, for no reason apparent to me, decided to shut itself completely off. The power never dimmed and my own computer remained on and usable during the whole debacle. When I turned it back on it seemed to think it was1999 instead of 2012. Neither love, money, threats, cajoling nor shutting the damn thing off would persuade it to come back to me. Of course the accounting program we use took great umbrage at being asked to write checks and record data for pay dates thirteen years in the future (remember it had decided it was 1999) and it wouldn’t co-operate at all. After much consternation and frustration the computer magically came back to 2012, again for no reason that I can discern, about the thirty-seventh time I rebooted it.

After many years of not knowing how to do so a few nights ago I finally figured out how to program a brew time into our latest coffeemaker. I was extremely pleased with myself and for the first time in my adult life I woke up to hot coffee in my own home. I have happily used it every day since. Until this morning that is. Some time during the night my coffee maker must have grown a brain and decided it didn’t like me. Maybe it hooked up with Melissa’s computer. At any rate, although everything was in the correct place, it looked like there had been a coffee explosion in the kitchen. I wiped up coffee from the cupboards *above* the coffee maker.

Maybe the right way to handle all this technology is to dispense with it altogether. Tomorrow morning maybe I’ll light a fire and brew coffee over hot coals in an iron pot. When I’m done I’ll throw on some green branches and communicate with everyone via smoke signals.


Lily and Maisie

Traveller, Norman and Cuffie

Levendi and Moe

Tony and Baby

Thomas, Hemi, Apollo and Trigger

Johnny and Rampal

Chance and Leo

Fabrizzio and Slinky grazing in the rain

Thor grazing in the rain

more rain grazers; Titan, Gus, Romeo, Faune, Winston, Silver

Lotus and Romeo being wild boys in the rain

Faune and Winston are grazing away while Lotus and Romeo are having a rodeo 2 feet away

Stormy and Toledo engaged in some horseplay

then Clayton and Toledo got really rowdy

someone on facebook very appropriately said that it looked like Toledo and Clayton were pretending to be mustangs in this picture

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